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Matthias Schmidt

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@eurofounder

Founder based in the EU • Building GDPR-compliant startups • 7 years in, €7k MRR
European Union Joined October 2025
242 Following 124K Followers 6.2K Posts

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Matthias Schmidt Verified account @eurofounder
Just discovered my 19 year old daughter has an OnlyFans account

I was devastated

She clearly must not be registered as a sole proprietor with the the German Trade Office

I sat her down and asked how much she'd made

She said €4,200

I nearly collapsed

That's at least €1,890 in unreported VAT obligations

She started crying but I did the only thing a good father could do

We spent the entire weekend filling out forms together

She's now fully compliant with a business registration and tax ID

Makes €340/month after taxes and social contributions

I've never been more proud of her

Only 19 and already an online entrepreneur

She has a bright future ahead of her
4.2K replies 2.3K reposts 50K likes 13M views View on X
Matthias Schmidt Verified account @eurofounder
Perfect day of Jensen Huang:

08:30 - Wake up to a surprise blowjob from a newly hired assistant

10:00 - Call the Anthropic CEO to negotiate priority allocation of 200,000 GPUs

12:00 - Lunch with faithful, loving wife

14:30 - Text seven women on four different continents: “daddy is horny, send a selfie?”

15:00 - Secure a $100B hyperscaler contract

16:00 - Send dick pics to three female VPs during a board meeting

18:00 - Have phone sex with a girlfriend in China

20:00 - Business dinner with the VP of Healthcare

21:00 - Anal sex in a restaurant bathroom with the VP of Healthcare

23:00 - Back home, kiss wife and children goodnight
15 replies 12 reposts 382 likes 22K views View on X
Matthias Schmidt Verified account @eurofounder
BREAKING: Nvidia has reportedly asked the EU to suggest a replacement for Jensen Huang as CEO

Potential candidates:

1. Karsten Wildberger - current Germany’s Minister for Digital Transformation and Government Modernisation

2. Henna Virkkunen - current EU Executive VP for Tech Sovereignty, Security and Democracy

3. Kristen Michal - current Prime Minister of Estonia

4. Greta Thunberg

As usual, Europe has to clean up the mess Americans created