high desert bestie :)

Imagine how the plot of The Bridal Wreath would have gone if Brother Edvin refused to give Kristin Lavransdatter spiritual direction outside of the seal of confession

*quietly closes chaplaincy ed tabs on firefox*

Fr: so I’ll go “the servant of God HDB is espoused to the servant of God [Redacted]” then put the ring on
Me: You mean betrothed, right?
Fr: yes, my bad. That would be highly illegal if I married you guys without a license and proper form.

*two hours later*

Fr: the servant of God [redacted] is espoused to the servant of God HDB – ahhh nuts I did it again

In my personal experience (mostly confessing in the Byzantine rite for the last year), if I have a sin that’s convoluted or might be scandalous for any reason, I try to describe it as succinctly yet honestly as I can, then ask if the priest needs more context. 9/10 times he says no but it allows him to have a space to ask a clarifying question without feeling intrusive. usually it’s just “help me identify the specific sin.”

I 100% think priests need to be mindful of how their questions are received, both to respect the dignity of the penitent and also defend themselves, but it’s important to note that grooming and spiritual or sexual abuse are not the exclusive domain of clergy. A priest should have the ability to ask a question so that a penitent can understand that something they might have experienced is not a sin on their part, and encourage them to make a report through proper channels.

Really unfair of the zoomer to be ageist against a mature gentleman trying to turn his life around and reenter the workforce