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Cash Ape
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10,000 Cash Apes opensea.io/collection/cas…
190 Following 634 Followers 202 Posts
Latest posts 5
10 DEGENS. 10 CASH APES. 10 FINANCIAL CRIME SCENES. 🦍💵
I asked you fuckers to tell me about your most degenerate financial decisions.
You did NOT disappoint. 😂
After reading through the financial trauma, questionable investments, and absolutely spectacular displays of conviction…
HERE ARE YOUR 10 CASH APE GIVEAWAY WINNERS!
1. @DeeJ7070Posted the bag screenshot, openly admitted he learned absolutely nothing, and is STILL IN THE FUCKING TRADE.
2. @crypto_ola1
Saw SOL at $1. Passed. Bought Squid Game token instead because he liked the show. Brother, WHAT THE FUCK. 💀
3. @theCryptoGoy Averaged down so hard he accidentally became the project’s largest institutional investor. Conviction is sometimes just panic wearing a suit. 😂
4. @xxpolarxxx
Believed a guy worth hundreds of millions would support his token. $12K later, he's still waiting for a reply. 😂
5. @auspic3s
Paid for a private liberal-arts degree. Turns out expensive education doesn't automatically come with expensive wages.
6. @Adelcollnft
Put his last spare cash into a "THIS IS MY TURN" play. Felt like a genius until the chart reminded him who was in charge.
7. @AshMeiko
Chased a pump and became somebody else's exit liquidity. A tale as old as crypto.
8. @Tyohandpix
Turned a normal trade into a full-time career staring at fucking candles. Sometimes the most expensive thing you lose is your peace.
9. @ChaseThemidnigh
Aped in on vibes. Zero research. Maximum confidence. Portfolio immediately requested a divorce.
10. @MaverixInMotion
Had a winning trade, held out for the perfect exit, and watched greed turn the profit into a life lesson.
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU DEGENERATE BASTARDS. 🦍💵
Each of you is getting ONE CASH APE!
Winners, DM me your receiving wallet address. Never send your seed phrase or private keys.
To everybody who participated, thank you for reminding me that no matter how bad my trades have been, somebody on this fucking app has done something worse. 😂
10 WINNERS. 10 CASH APES.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE.
I asked you fuckers to tell me about your most degenerate financial decisions.
You did NOT disappoint. 😂
After reading through the financial trauma, questionable investments, and absolutely spectacular displays of conviction…
HERE ARE YOUR 10 CASH APE GIVEAWAY WINNERS!
1. @DeeJ7070Posted the bag screenshot, openly admitted he learned absolutely nothing, and is STILL IN THE FUCKING TRADE.
2. @crypto_ola1
Saw SOL at $1. Passed. Bought Squid Game token instead because he liked the show. Brother, WHAT THE FUCK. 💀
3. @theCryptoGoy Averaged down so hard he accidentally became the project’s largest institutional investor. Conviction is sometimes just panic wearing a suit. 😂
4. @xxpolarxxx
Believed a guy worth hundreds of millions would support his token. $12K later, he's still waiting for a reply. 😂
5. @auspic3s
Paid for a private liberal-arts degree. Turns out expensive education doesn't automatically come with expensive wages.
6. @Adelcollnft
Put his last spare cash into a "THIS IS MY TURN" play. Felt like a genius until the chart reminded him who was in charge.
7. @AshMeiko
Chased a pump and became somebody else's exit liquidity. A tale as old as crypto.
8. @Tyohandpix
Turned a normal trade into a full-time career staring at fucking candles. Sometimes the most expensive thing you lose is your peace.
9. @ChaseThemidnigh
Aped in on vibes. Zero research. Maximum confidence. Portfolio immediately requested a divorce.
10. @MaverixInMotion
Had a winning trade, held out for the perfect exit, and watched greed turn the profit into a life lesson.
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU DEGENERATE BASTARDS. 🦍💵
Each of you is getting ONE CASH APE!
Winners, DM me your receiving wallet address. Never send your seed phrase or private keys.
To everybody who participated, thank you for reminding me that no matter how bad my trades have been, somebody on this fucking app has done something worse. 😂
10 WINNERS. 10 CASH APES.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE.
FREE CASH APES, YOU FUCKING ANIMALS. 🦍💵
While my boy is busy trying to break the entire Cash Apes protocol, I figured I’d give the community something to do besides stare at the chart and ask me when Stacker goes live. 😂
I’M GIVING AWAY 10 CASH APES TO 10 PEOPLE!
Here’s how to enter:
❤️ LIKE this post.
🔁 RETWEET it.
💬 REPLY with your answer to this question:
What is the most degenerate financial decision you’ve ever made, and what did it teach you?
I want the stories.
The $200 that became $20K.
The $20K that became a fucking screenshot.
The coin you bought because a cartoon animal looked trustworthy.
The NFT you bought at 3 AM because you were convinced you had discovered generational wealth. 😂
10 winners. 10 Cash Apes.
I’ll announce the winners in a follow-up post.
Until then, let’s hear your best financial war stories.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE. 🐒💵
While my boy is busy trying to break the entire Cash Apes protocol, I figured I’d give the community something to do besides stare at the chart and ask me when Stacker goes live. 😂
I’M GIVING AWAY 10 CASH APES TO 10 PEOPLE!
Here’s how to enter:
❤️ LIKE this post.
🔁 RETWEET it.
💬 REPLY with your answer to this question:
What is the most degenerate financial decision you’ve ever made, and what did it teach you?
I want the stories.
The $200 that became $20K.
The $20K that became a fucking screenshot.
The coin you bought because a cartoon animal looked trustworthy.
The NFT you bought at 3 AM because you were convinced you had discovered generational wealth. 😂
10 winners. 10 Cash Apes.
I’ll announce the winners in a follow-up post.
Until then, let’s hear your best financial war stories.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE. 🐒💵
GM CASH APES 🦍💵
We are getting to a very different part of this build now.
Right now I have 2 internal steps left before Cash Apes is basically sitting on external launch gates.
1. FINISH THE LAST CI RUN
The current candidate is sitting at the exact tip I want.
Vercel is green.
The remaining CI run is queued, and I need that exact build to come back clean.
No changing shit afterward and saying “close enough.”
2. PIN THAT EXACT CERTIFIED BUILD TO MAIN
Once it clears, I update the authorized target and fast-forward main to the exact candidate that was actually tested.
At that point, internally?
I STOP FUCKING TOUCHING IT. 😂
Then the remaining gates are outside the normal build process:
external review
legal
final art / metadata / CID freeze
And the big one coming next:
MY PARTNER IS GOING THROUGH THE ENTIRE REPO THIS WEEKEND.
I don’t want him looking at a curated little folder of shit I think is important.
I want him looking at the whole fucking machine.
His job is not to tell me how smart I am.
His job is to find the thing I missed.
And if he finds something?
I fix it.
If he doesn’t?
Then we are getting dangerously close to me running out of excuses not to turn this fucking thing on. 😂
That has been the philosophy from the beginning:
BUILD IT.
ATTACK IT.
FIX IT.
FREEZE IT.
HAND IT TO SOMEBODY ELSE AND TELL THEM TO ATTACK IT AGAIN.
We’re almost at the part where my contribution becomes keeping my hands off the keyboard.
Which, historically, may be the hardest fucking security control in the entire protocol.
🐒💵 STACK $CASH. LEVEL APES. FEED THE FUCKING MACHINE.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE.
We are getting to a very different part of this build now.
Right now I have 2 internal steps left before Cash Apes is basically sitting on external launch gates.
1. FINISH THE LAST CI RUN
The current candidate is sitting at the exact tip I want.
Vercel is green.
The remaining CI run is queued, and I need that exact build to come back clean.
No changing shit afterward and saying “close enough.”
2. PIN THAT EXACT CERTIFIED BUILD TO MAIN
Once it clears, I update the authorized target and fast-forward main to the exact candidate that was actually tested.
At that point, internally?
I STOP FUCKING TOUCHING IT. 😂
Then the remaining gates are outside the normal build process:
external review
legal
final art / metadata / CID freeze
And the big one coming next:
MY PARTNER IS GOING THROUGH THE ENTIRE REPO THIS WEEKEND.
I don’t want him looking at a curated little folder of shit I think is important.
I want him looking at the whole fucking machine.
His job is not to tell me how smart I am.
His job is to find the thing I missed.
And if he finds something?
I fix it.
If he doesn’t?
Then we are getting dangerously close to me running out of excuses not to turn this fucking thing on. 😂
That has been the philosophy from the beginning:
BUILD IT.
ATTACK IT.
FIX IT.
FREEZE IT.
HAND IT TO SOMEBODY ELSE AND TELL THEM TO ATTACK IT AGAIN.
We’re almost at the part where my contribution becomes keeping my hands off the keyboard.
Which, historically, may be the hardest fucking security control in the entire protocol.
🐒💵 STACK $CASH. LEVEL APES. FEED THE FUCKING MACHINE.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE.
GM CASH APES 🦍💵
Today is going to be a weird split-screen kind of day.
I’ll be handling some Cash Apes shit, but apparently the mortgage gods decided to dump a massive fucking pile of business on my desk all at once. 😂
So I have to go be a responsible adult for a few hours and help people buy houses.
Then tonight:
MASSIVE CASH APES CLEANUP.
I’m going through everything.
Cleaning the repo.
Cleaning the loose ends.
Cleaning anything that doesn’t belong.
Getting the machine into the exact condition I want it in for the next set of eyes.
And after that?
I’M DONE FUCKING WITH IT.
Until my boy finishes his audit, there is nothing productive about me inventing more shit to change just because I’m impatient.
So...
WE WAIT.
My grandfather always told me:
patience is a virtue.
After having three children, I can now confirm that the old bastard was unfortunately correct. 😂
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is absolutely fucking nothing.
Especially in crypto.
Everybody wants movement.
Everybody wants announcements.
Everybody wants candles.
Everybody wants the button pushed RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
But sometimes you build the machine, check the machine, hand the machine to somebody else to attack...
and then you keep your grubby little degen hands off of it until they’re finished.
That’s where I’m at.
And for everyone staring at the floor right now:
Yes, the price is low.
We’ve been here before.
You all remember what happened the last time everybody started acting like the sky was falling.
I’m not telling anybody what to buy, sell, or hold.
I’m saying don’t let a chart make you forget what is actually being built.
The Stack isn’t live yet.
The new machine isn’t turned on yet.
The flywheel isn’t running yet.
So for now...
BE STILL, YOU FUCKING ANIMALS. 😂
Let the audit happen.
Let me finish the cleanup.
Let the work speak when it’s ready.
Then we turn the machine on.
🐒💵 STACK $CASH. LEVEL APES. FEED THE FUCKING MACHINE.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE.
Today is going to be a weird split-screen kind of day.
I’ll be handling some Cash Apes shit, but apparently the mortgage gods decided to dump a massive fucking pile of business on my desk all at once. 😂
So I have to go be a responsible adult for a few hours and help people buy houses.
Then tonight:
MASSIVE CASH APES CLEANUP.
I’m going through everything.
Cleaning the repo.
Cleaning the loose ends.
Cleaning anything that doesn’t belong.
Getting the machine into the exact condition I want it in for the next set of eyes.
And after that?
I’M DONE FUCKING WITH IT.
Until my boy finishes his audit, there is nothing productive about me inventing more shit to change just because I’m impatient.
So...
WE WAIT.
My grandfather always told me:
patience is a virtue.
After having three children, I can now confirm that the old bastard was unfortunately correct. 😂
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is absolutely fucking nothing.
Especially in crypto.
Everybody wants movement.
Everybody wants announcements.
Everybody wants candles.
Everybody wants the button pushed RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
But sometimes you build the machine, check the machine, hand the machine to somebody else to attack...
and then you keep your grubby little degen hands off of it until they’re finished.
That’s where I’m at.
And for everyone staring at the floor right now:
Yes, the price is low.
We’ve been here before.
You all remember what happened the last time everybody started acting like the sky was falling.
I’m not telling anybody what to buy, sell, or hold.
I’m saying don’t let a chart make you forget what is actually being built.
The Stack isn’t live yet.
The new machine isn’t turned on yet.
The flywheel isn’t running yet.
So for now...
BE STILL, YOU FUCKING ANIMALS. 😂
Let the audit happen.
Let me finish the cleanup.
Let the work speak when it’s ready.
Then we turn the machine on.
🐒💵 STACK $CASH. LEVEL APES. FEED THE FUCKING MACHINE.
PUT THE $CASH IN THE APE.